Tuesday, April 12, 2016

Change - New Mom Confession


My name is "Mrs. Martin",  I'm 28. I will be 29 this fall.  In September I had a beautiful baby boy.
I'm proud to say I had a natural birth.  I felt pretty strong and good right after birth.  I was determined to do it all. Care for the baby, keep house and be awesome in general.  I started breastfeeding and my baby grew. 

At a Dr. apt it became apparent my boy hadn't "pinked" up and still had a lot of yellow from jaundice.  My doctor thought it was possibly caused by breast milk. After a blood test on baby, and week off...his levels dropped. I was his problem. Swell....

I was told I could go back to breast feeding - but that was hard after a week of no feeding. I didn't do a good job of pumping on the side and....my leave was also about up and there really wasn't any good place to pump at work; without dying of embarrassment.  I know breast feeding is nothing to be embarrassed over - but the sound of the little machine is, and in a professional setting its not ideal. 

So after a lot of thought I just stopped breast feeding and switched to formula.  Luckily I had a great doctor who reassured me "formula" babies go college too.  Little boy began to thrive and really grow!

The switch to work was and is extremely hard.  If I'm the one who has to drop him off at the sitters I will cry until I hit the main highway....still.

I now sit on my butt for 8 hours a day.  I had only gained 10-15lbs of baby weight, 6 of that was my baby.  After birth I was wearing my pre-pregger clothes.  They fit a little different but I was in them!

My baby is now 6 months old.  I told my husband I wish I was pregnant still. I was pudgy with purpose...now I'm just pudgy.  Lately I've noticed my clothes just don't fit right.  I swear things have shifted. I had counted on breastfeeding to help shuck the extra weight....of course that didn't pan out!

6 months in, my house is a disaster most days.  My hair has lost its luster.  The bags under my eyes are there to stay.  I used to feel so put together, now I feel gross almost all the time.  But do I love spending time with that little man!!!

I have had time to really think this over...in the wee hours of the AM rocking little man back to sleep. Things are only going to get better if I take action.  I came up with a plan.

I'm going to use this blog to keep myself honest. I intend to change my diet and Lord help me - find time to exercise. This means getting up in the wee hours of the morning. The only time I have available that isn't devoted to my baby or household.  Goal is 3 times a week. I also hope this summer allows for more of a chance to get outside. This early spring cold snap has kept us house bound. Too chilly for little ones....

Soooo here goes nothing!
Tomorrow is Day 1 - Goal - get up at 5:00 - walk a mile or so........NO junk food - and that means no 3:00 pm soda.